From Y to Y
by Sakumira Agashi
Summary: It had been a long time after the Wither Storm was defeated and Magnus visited Ellegaard's funeral before going home. He expressed his feeling of him missing her, remembered the sad memories back in the day they broke up and became enemies. He wished he could see her again, but he didn't know that her spirit was right there with him and listened to every word of his.


**Guys… when will I stop making new stories, especially sad romance ones?**

 **Nah, just kidding. I LOVE MAKING THEM AND THEY'RE MY THING NOW!**

 **But anyway…I always wonder why I'm so into sad and emotional Vocaloid songs. Especilly this song: From Y to Y. I fell in love with it the first moment I heard the tune! Pretty awkward, huh?**

 **One day, I went to YouTube to listen to it and I suddenly saw the English version by LittleJaneyCakes. I tried it and now… I don't know which version I prefer! I guess that I love both :3**

 **I use the English version here. If you want to try it then I recommend you do it right now because IT'S EXTREMELY GOOD!**

 **This story takes place after episode 4, after Ellegaard passed away.**

 **Enjoy. Remember to R & R :D **

**I don't own anything here but this story. All things belong to their respectful owners.**

* * *

 **From Y to Y**

 **Music and lyrics by JimmyThumb-P**

 **English version by LittleJaneyCakes**

 **A songfic by Sakumira Agashi**

I walked closer and closer to the funeral. I left footsteps behind me as I took every heavy step toward my dear lover. The one that once made my heart melt, the one that once broke my heart and the one that made me wandering with my own mind after she had passed away…

I stopped and stared at the funeral. My beloved girl was lying in it and waiting for me. I put the roses on the ground and sat down.

"Hello again Ellegaard…" I mumbled out loud, although I knew she wouldn't hear it. "It has been a while, hasn't it? Heh, I miss you very much, do you know that?"

I waited and finally received my answer which was the quiet wind that came by. I spoke again.

"It has been a year… Guess what, Jesse and his gang have become the next Order of the Stone. Are you happy? I think you should, nerd."

I received a silence.

"Yeah, I remember…" I smiled gently. "Jesse decided to take your armor."

Another wind came by.

"Yes, of course that I don't blame him. It was your will to let him take it, but I think that he should take mine back then… What do you think?"

Silence once again.

"No? Ha ha, you always are a nerd."

The leaves on the tree rustled slightly, and I smiled at them. "You don't like me calling you that? But what if I like doing so? What can you do, huh Ellie?"

The leaved rustled again, it sounded just like her giggles.

"You like the name Ellie? It's your nickname I chose for you, don't you remember?"

"Ha ha, yeah… I know you like it very much. You always blushed whenever I used it."

"Remember the time that I accidentally blew up your library while testing my TNT? You were so angry at me."

"Hey, do you know that Gabriel once drooled on your book when he was sleeping?"

"Ellie, still get the joke I used on you back then?"

"Hey Ellie…"

"Ellie…"

"Hey…"

* * *

 _I slowly opened my eyes and looked around. The trees was rustling slightly and making an enjoyable sound, the sunshine was gently shone down the ground. It was a fine morning._

 _I took a step forward with my bare feet, but why I felt so light? It was like that I was walking on clouds, like I was floating. I felt very strange._

 _Suddenly, I heard someone was talking from afar. I stepped closer and saw Magnus, my dear lover. But why he was talking alone in front of a funeral, and why he looked so sad? I don't like seeing him being sad, I would do anything to make him smile. So I went closer to him and called out._

" _Magnus! What are you doing here all alone?"_

 _He didn't reply and continued to talk to himself. I called out more but he seemed couldn't hear me and it started to annoy me. I came closer until I was right next to him, but he still didn't see me like he was trying to ignore me. I put a hand on his shoulder._

" _Magnus! Can you hea-"_

 _I was cut off when my hand went straight through his shoulder. I quickly took my hand back and my face pale a little. What did happen!? I tried again and again but found no effort._

 _I looked at my hands and I almost faint: I could almost see through my own hands! I then looked at my whole body and panicked more. My short brown hair and eyes were still normal as before; but instead of my clothes, I was wearing a knee-length pure dress with two laces at the top that were tied behind the back of my neck. I looked at the funeral and saw my name on it._

 _I realized that I had become a spirit._

 _I screamed, and I knew he couldn't hear it in anyway. I tried to remember what happened and eventually, I did. When the wither storm had come near, Jesse was the only one that could stop it. But going without armor would be very dangerous, so both I and Magnus offered him our armor. In the end he took mine. While he was struggling with it, it swung a tentacle at me and made me hit a tree. It was a pure pain and he quickly came to me. I chocked and tried to fight against myself for my life, but it seemed like that my strength had gone away. So I used all of my last breaths to say goodbye to everybody, especially my beloved one. He didn't cry, but knew he was crying in his mind. He didn't want me to see him crying in my last moments._

 _Now I realized that he wasn't talking to himself; he was talking to my non-existed self, pretending that I was there. I wish I could sit with him and used all of my words to comfort him. I wanted to say that I was here, but of course that he couldn't hear or see me. So all I could do was listening to him and talked back, although he wouldn't hear them._

 _Suddenly, he stood up and took one glance at my funeral._

" _It's my time to go. Good bye Ellie, I will return as soon as I could."_

 **You stood and started walking**

 **Slowly turning my back on me,**

 **And without a single word, you slipped away.**

 _Huh!? Why did he have to leave so soon? I wanted him to stay longer. Don't leave me, not now!_

 **All these thoughts are forming deep inside,**

 **But all I can do is cry**

 _Tears ran down my face as he slowly walked away. I put one hand on my chest and reached out for him with the other. I mumbled out loud._

" **Don't go away,**

 **Oh, won't you stay,**

 **Please…"**

* * *

I stood up and walked away from her. I wanted to have more time with her, really. But the sun was setting down and it was my cue to return. She must be very sad, but I would return, right? And while I was talking, I felt that someone was there, I felt that _she_ was there with me.

Nah… it was my imagination. She had gone from my life.

 **I moved and walked away too,**

 **Slowly turning my back on you,**

 **Gotta leave before the tears fall,**

 **And I'm crying**

I felt my eyes started to water as I thought about her. I missed her smile, I missed her gentle words, I missed every moment I spent with her.

No… I couldn't be like this. I couldn't cry like this so I used my sleeve to wipe them away. She brought happiness, but she also once brought pain to me.

 **I pretend I have no need for it,**

 **Don't think that I deserve happiness,**

 **Try to be strong, to carry on,**

 **Forgetting out future**

 **Future**

 _ **Future**_

 **Future**

 _ **Future**_

 **Future**

I have to be strong, I have to move on. I couldn't let her see me like this, no… She would be so sad she saw me like this… if she was here. My wish… can it even be real?

 **I'll never get it back**

 **I wish,**

 _ **I wish**_

 **I wish,**

 _ **I wish**_

 **I wish,**

I sighed.

… **aah.**

I tried to forget about _that_ day as I headed home.

* * *

 _I watched sadly as he slowly walked away without taking any glance back. I wanted our moment to last longer, so I follow him silently._

 _He was probably thought about the day that I broke his heart. It was a misunderstood! I didn't do that and I never wanted to! But he didn't listen to me despite how much I tried to convince him._

 _But… why would I want to remember about those painful memories?_

* * *

 **Now my small one-bedroom feels so huge,**

 **All it's missing is you**

 **The emptiness just seems to stretch,**

 **I can't shake this feeling.**

I opened the door of my bedroom and stepped inside. This is the place that I sleep… and the place that held so many memories with her.

Ivor, Soren and Gabriel didn't know that every night, she would go this very room and we would cuddle into each other's warmth under the blanket. I would touch her soft hair and she sometimes would make me drifting into sleep with her quiet but sweet voice. Man… I couldn't tell how much I miss her…

* * *

 _Magnus closed the door, I looked around and nearly broke into tears at the room that held our memories together. The moments that he would touched my hair, and he would go to sleep with my voice that he considered as "beautiful"._

 _I wanted to get back those moments, even just a while then I would be happy enough._

 **For the moment I am trapped in time**

 **Everything's so clear, I realize**

 **That I only want to be with you**

 _I… want them so badly! I just want to be with him! That's my only wish…_

 **Is this world really so cruel**

 **That I can't share my only wish with you**

 **Even if it's a lie, that finally makes you cry**

 **So that even you can't hide**

 **The way you feel inside,**

 **And I know I've made mistakes**

 **There are so many sins I wish I could erase**

 **One of them is that I touched your hand**

I wanted to feel her warmth again, I wanted to touch her beautiful hands, her soft hair, I want to hear her gentle voice… I flopped on my bed as I kept repeating those words in my mind.

 **But my biggest is trying to-**

 **Just live a happy live with you.**

I glanced over my nightstand and my eyes widened. That velvet box… those rings inside it… It was still there without me realizing it. Tears started to form on my eyes again as I picked it and brought it to my chest.

Those tearful memories that I tried to forget flooded in my mind again.

* * *

 _I still stood there beside his bed as he lied on it while staring at the ceiling. It was like that he was thinking of something, but I couldn't tell what he was thinking. I sat beside him on the edge of the bed._

 _He glanced over his nightstand and suddenly his eyes widened. Curious, I glanced at it and my heart skipped a beat. That velvet box… those rings inside it… he still kept it even after that day?_

 _I recalled my try-to-forget memories as he brought it to his chest._

* * *

 **There's a limited amount of time,**

 **And an enclosed space of our memories,**

 **And as I moved, I'm losing you,**

 **To the distant between us.**

* * *

 **Many years ago…**

My heart kept beating as I took every step forward to the park. We had a date at it and I'm half happy half nervous.

I'm happy because… tonight I had decided to propose to her after a long time we started dating. I sometimes imagine our life together as a married couple, having children running in our sweet house and calling Ivor, Soren and Gabriel "uncle". They would be so proud about that.

But what made me nervous was that… I wondered if I'm ready for this. What would happen if I couldn't be a good husband and father? And what if she wasn't ready for our marriage?

But all those nerves vanished as I reached the park.

As I walked further in, I saw her behind a tree. I was going to call for her before I saw that someone was with her. I walked closer and nearly dropped the bouquet and the velvet box.

She… she was kissing that unknown guy! He had her pinned to the tree and his hands held her wrists tightly, their lips were pressed together and he was kissing her passionately.

"E.. Ellegaard!?"

Hearing my voice, that guy broke the kiss and stared at me. He smirked as Ellegaard looked at me, her eyes filled with fear.

"Hey, it isn't good to break couples' privacy. You should leave now."

"W…What…?" I mumbled out.

"M- Magnus! It isn't what you think!" Ellegaard exclaimed, but her voice seemed nothing for me now.

"W… Why Ellegaard?" I said, voice filled with anger. "I love you very much, I do everything to make you happy… and now you repay me by cheating!?"

"No! Magnus! Please listen to me!"

"That's IT!" I shouted. "We're done from now on! Goodbye Ellegaard!"

"Magnus, wait! I could explain!"

I pretended that I was deaf and walked away without bothering to look back.

* * *

 _I was waiting behind the tree at the park, waiting for Magnus to come. We had a date here and I'm happy. I always like spending time with him, that sometimes help my stress goes away._

 _Speaking of him… he had been acting strangely recently. He usually daydreamed while talking with the others in our team, especially to me. I sometimes had to shout out his name to snap him out. What was he thinking?_

 _While I was wandering with my thought, someone pinned me to the tree before I could resist. I looked at him, eyes filled with fear. He smirked._

" _My my… isn't it the Redstone Engineer Ellegaard?"_

" _W… What do you want? Let me go!" I said and struggled._

" _Heh, you think I'll let you go that easily…" he smirked again. "My love?"_

" _What!? I'm not your love!"_

" _You're my love in my heart, Ellie."_

 _How dare he use my nickname Magnus chose for me? Only magnus could call me that._

" _I have had a crush on you for a long time, Ellegaard. Forget about your Magnus let me have you."_

" _No- um um um!"_

 _He crushed his lips to mine and I tried to push him away, but he was too strong. I struggled, but he held my wrists tightly above my head with one hand. I couldn't let Magnus see this! I couldn-_

" _E… Ellegaard!?"_

 _A familiar voice coming from nowhere and he quickly broke the kiss. My eyes widened in fear as I saw Magnus standing there, his hand shaking like he was going to drop the bouquet and velvet box in his hand._

 _Velvet box? Was he going to…? No… it can't be… not at this moment!_

 _The man smirked. "Hey, it isn't good to break couples' privacy. You should leave now."_

 _How could he say that we were couple? And how dare he tell Magnus to leave!?_

" _W… What?" He mumbled out._

" _Magnus! It isn't what it looks like!" I exclaimed. But he stared at me coldly._

" _W… Why Ellegaard? I love you very much, I do everything to make you happy… and now you repay me by cheating!?" He said angrily._

" _No! Magns! Please listen to me!"_

" _That's IT! We're done from now on! Goodbye Ellegaard!"_

 _Then he turned away without looking back. I shouted._

" _Magnus, wait! I could explain!"_

 _But he still didn't turn back._

* * *

 **All the thoughts that you used to have on me,**

 **Are now embedded in our memory**

* * *

 **End of flashback…**

 _I put my hands over my face to cover the tears that were coming from my eyes. From then on, he saw me as his enemy and that broke my heart so much. I tried to convince him, I wanted to show him that my love for him isn't a fake feeling._

 _Why did that have to happen? Why…?_

 **So I know that with time I'll be erased,**

 **And I'll fade**

 _Now he had probably forgot about our wonderful time together. Right? No! He wouldn't forget me! He wouldn't!_

 _I held my head as tears continued to run down my cheeks._

 **Aah!**

 **What now?**

 **Can we go back again someday somehow?**

 _ **I wanna go back!**_

 _I want to return to the day we were happy together._

 **Please restart**

 _I want to start over!_

 **Please don't fall apart!**

 _Memories, please don't fade away! Don't let our heart fall apart! Don't let them shatter!_

 **Aah! Ooh!**

* * *

 **I'm still sleeping in my bed**

 **That's far too large for me now that you've gone and left**

 **I'm dreaming on my own, still stuck here all alone,**

 **Can these dreams lead me to you – even if they're untrue?**

I kept staring at the empty space next to me on the bed. I felt as empty as it looked in my heart. If she was still here, lying next to me then I swear I wouldn't want to get up. Never…

But all those dreams would still be remain in my heart, in my mind… They didn't exist anymore, they're no longer here…

 **And I know that I've made mistakes,**

 **There are so many sins I wish I could erase,**

 **One of them is that I touched your hand**

 **But my biggest is trying to –**

 **Just live a happy live with you**

 **Whoo,**

 **And now I'll bare the pain of loneliness forever more…**

Even if I could find a new love, she still couldn't fill the empty space in my heart. The space of sadness, the space of loneliness and the space of our memories.

* * *

 _Seeing him like this broke my heart so much… It made my heart tighten that I have to hold my chest at the pain I was carrying. I wanted to comfort him, I wanted to make him happy, to make him smile, I wanted to bring happiness to him._

 _But for now…_

 **Let me stay within your memory –**

 **That's all I need.**

 _Yes, that's all I need now… to be remain in his memory, to stay in his heart, to exist in his mind…_

 **I hope that we'll meet again someday,**

 **But just for now I'll be here waiting,**

 **To see your hand reaches out for mine,**

 **But this isn't our time,**

 _I planted a kiss on him cheek before saying my last words._

 **So goodbye.**

* * *

 **Phew… that is the longest one-shot I have written so far. Leave a review if you like it. I'm gonna take a break now.**

 **Bye!**


End file.
